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  • Writer's pictureJohn Dolan

Sometimes, Relief Comes in One-Liners

Updated: Aug 21, 2019

Ever felt depressed? Of course you have. Everybody does now and again. Some unlucky souls suffer from recurrent or nigh-permanent depression.

I don't have a pill for that.

What I do have is a collection of one-liners, loving curated over the years, which can be a useful tonic when more serious philosophy fails to dispel a black mood. So, here are a few of my favourites for you.


Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive. ~ Elbert Hubbard

Life – a spiritual pickle preserving the body from decay. ~ Ambrose Bierce

We live in an age where pizza gets to your home before the police. ~ Jeff Marder

I have a simple philosophy: Fill what’s empty. Empty what’s full. Scratch where it itches. ~ Alice Roosevelt Longworth

Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society. ~ Mark Twain

Experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes. ~ Oscar Wilde

We must believe in free will – we have no choice. ~ Isaac Bashevis Singer

Never saw off the branch you are on, unless you are being hanged from it. ~ Stanislaw J Lee

In the long run we are all dead. ~ John Maynard Keynes

The first half of our lives is ruined by our parents and the second half by our children.~ Clarence Darrow

Science in the modern world has many uses; its chief use, however, is to provide long words to cover the errors of the rich. ~ G K Chesterton

Any idiot can face a crisis – it’s day to day living that wears you out. ~ Anton Chekhov

Not a shred of evidence exists in favour of the idea that life is serious. ~ Brendan Gill

Ignorance more frequently begets confidence than does knowledge. ~ Charles Darwin

If the world should blow itself up, the last audible voice would be that of an expert saying it can’t be done. ~ Peter Ustinov

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